SO USELESS

While trying to cross this very very busy road I had some very very random thoughts. As if navigating vehicles was not enough, I even had to navigate dried pieces of human excreta. Don't ask me how I know its human left overs. Accept my authority on this subject because if I try proving it, you will throw up.

Coming back to the point, while I was navigating automobiles and shit, the person who lives in my head said, "I can handle animal shit, but never ever do I want to step on human shit. That too unknown human shit."

With this thought I reached the other side, but something else pooped oops popped up in my head. Human beings are the most useless creation by who you can call GOD (WYCCG). Nothing of theirs is useful to others. Their blood is good for vampires but we are not sure of their existence. Apart from that some tigers and lions do eat them but they are killed for doing so. Utterly useless.

While the other creations kind of live with each other and help each other out in some way. Humans are out on their own trip, destroying the relation rest of the creations have among themselves.

That's why we were created! Everything created first was so beautiful, pleasant and harmonious. It would stay like that forever. SO the creator or WYCCG got bored and thought lets think out of the box! She/he made humans. Ugly, useless things which would never gel in with the rest of the creations.

These were meant to create trouble so that the creator could keep coming up with newer stuff and have some administration work to do. We have been created to destroy perfection and beauty and we do that really well.

So unlike all the movies we make, where a tornado or an animal is out kill humans, humans are the real destruction machine. But unfortunately its a Man with the Movie Camera.

RAINMANTIC

The sun is not in its full glory,
clouds are covering its glow.
It comes out to clear the mess,
and then the clouds pour.

At last that drop gets to come down,
to meet its scorched lover.
And soon they all pour down,
pushing every obstacle to the corner.

The ground is brown, dry and sad,
it looks up, calling out to his temperamental lover.
And one by one parts of it start changing colour.

As I dive under the roof,
to keep myself dry.
I can't help but see with envy
the way the lovers unite.

MOM, DAD and KIDS

Multitasking is bad very bad. I always knew. You should always do one thing at a time, was something my Mom told me when I was a kid. I stuck to it. One thing at a time. But not everyone listens to mommy.

Talking of mommy, the other day someone asked me why I could not get lunch from home. And I said that I will have to wake up so early to do that. Then as I was walking back home it struck me that for almost 15 years of her life my mom used to wake up really early to pack delicious lunch for school. Sometimes she would pack sandwiches and I would grumble.

Till the date this thought never crossed me I never thanked her for the effort. I feel really bad. Realisations are bad! So thanks mommy for making every lunch break so much more delicious. Did you have a realisation? Go thank mommy NOW!

Again talking of mommies, I met another one just yesterday. Shared an auto with her. She was a newbie and worried that unlike other children in her society her 11 month old was not learning anything. (I got my PhD when I was 11 months dude!) Well he does not even clap.

So since the child is not learning her hubby dearest (who btw work really really really hard)wants mommy to leave her job and stay at home and look after the kid. She is the mother, the child came from her so its her job. He just gave a sperm right?

Its easy to guess the advise I gave her. Told her hubby darling was equally responsible. But the woman had made up her mind.

When I was giving her all the advise about what she could do she suddenly asked me, "Are you married?"

I smiled at her and said, "This is exactly why I am not married. I can't make the decision you have already made."

A lot of married working mothers have to deal with this at some point in their life. Its really sad how in spite of everything the mother is held responsible for anything that goes wrong with the child. Perhaps most of them are told "You don't need to work look after the kids!" If you have a glaring, grouching ready to pounce on you mother in law then say good bye to mental peace.

Yes babies need their mothers but there is a lot that fathers can do once the child is no longer dependent on the mother for its food.

If fathers were not really required, people would not make such big issue about getting married and then having children. No science says that only married women can have children.

We do give up a big chunk of our identity to give you the pleasure of having a child. So don't shirk off responsibility dads. We choose you to get our babies, we could have chosen someone else and we could if you don't take up responsibility soon.

NOT SO OFFENSIVE

So it seems a lot of chairs rattled after reading my previous post. I had some interesting discussions with a friend over email. It does add a bit to what I say. So bear with my lashing words yet again. Fortunately its an excerpt and not the entire conversation so your blood pressure won't shoot up too high this time. Here goes it:

"....We have super powers but we hide them, our power has been converted into a taboo. No one should know when it happens.

Why does the chemist still hide a Whisper pack in a newspaper and a hideous black polythene bag?

What am trying to say is that very conveniently someone converted our strength into our weakness.

Its time we realise that and set the equations right.

It won't happen tomorrow but maybe it could just start with asking for a pack of Whisper over the counter and refusing to hide it in a hideous black bag."

That the product is called Whisper is a sign itself that we need to shout!

OFFENSIVE

Once every month I hate being a woman! The anticipation and the pain kills me. It reminds me there is something happening in this body and can be only stopped briefly if I make use of it. Or I just have to wait and get older and older till its gone forever.

This, one of the very woman things is responsible for a lot of stuff imposed on us. So woman can't do hard work because for a few days every month they bleed like pigs (am not sure if pigs bleed a lot I could not think of another animal). They cannot be good at sports because movement could be troublesome during those days.

They should be confined to their homes and locked in isolation because they are impure, probably toxic. And they better not enter any of the sacred religious places because God or whoever that thing is does not like impurity.

Well if ovulating makes us impure once a month then men should be kept in isolation all their life! Aren't those things they have always in great numbers throughout the year and throughout their freaking life!. Even vampire males seem to have a good stock of it. They don't bleed because of it but the sight of a bosom makes it rush.

And since when did God or whoever it is start turning up his nose to impurity? Well She/he created it so they better deal with it.

Then comes the hard work and being weak bit. Guys, try shoving out a live human from your body and then talk about your strength. Even when that live thing is in our body we work more than you do.


You complain about women getting preference when it comes to the job market, or getting a house? Do a double check and see all the preferential treatment you get away with by just having a lifeless thing hanging between your legs. Something you are super proud of.

But hey guys you need a woman to get that thing working (unless you are gay)!

I am super embarrassed by my previous post. Sometimes you do things in a fit of passion and then you want to hide under the table.

This is not the first time something like this has occurred. Its something that happens very frequently and thats why I always want to sit under the table.

Is passion bad? No! passion is the key to success! But boughts of passion are bad. Changing passions are bad. Once your passion changes, you regret all you did when you were passionate about it.

I know everything and yet I make these mistakes. Am going under the table now.

CONNECTIONS

It was the best birthday ever. The sorrow of stepping really close to 25 was taken over by a surge of surprises. Whoever needs boy friends when you have an awesome lot of friends pulling the best surprise ever on your birthday? No boyfriend ever will be able to do this.

And today someone else is where I was last week. He came to my birthday in one of his avatars but he will not see me in his. So this post is for him.

He plays the role of someone I probably love more than him but he is not him. He is someone else different from what he plays on screen. He is not as beautiful as him but he is beautiful in his own way.

His eyes are the most beautiful ones I've ever seen. I could use the same words that Bassanio uses to describe Portia's eyes in Merchant of Venice.

There is more to him than just the beauty of his face. And it makes me very very curious. This man who shot to fame and is loved by all has some lurking sadness within him. Either this is true or he is just a great actor!

We do have some link. We came to the world at the same time. We formed into our being simultaneously, though I was faster than him. We were created at the same time.

There is some connect. I don't want to marry him at present. I will be more than happy to see him with the girl they say he is currently dating.

But I want to sit somewhere and talk to him. Listen to all the theories he has about life. And maybe he would like to listen to some of mine. Then give each other a high five and go our ways. If we are meant to be together then we would probably meet again.

For once I am being realistic. Age does that to you.