If there was some sort
of a system of giving certain titles to the years of your life, I’d title my 26th
year as the Year of Awakening. It’s also because I began 26 in a not-so-sober-state. Post the drunken stupor everything is a rude shock.
A piece of advice
before I elaborate the Awakening:
I know getting drunk
on your birthday is really cool and all, but then it really isn’t. The person
who got you into this world had to bear a lot of pain to push you out. She did
not have the option of taking a tequila shot. She brought you in sober, and the
doctor gave you one hard smack to make sure you were also sober. So being sober
on the day you were born is a natural choice. Stick to it and you won’t have
life smacking you back to sobriety. That’s the end of my advice.
When I think of my 26th
year so far, I see a caricatured version of myself with a crooked tiara on her
head. Her eyes are shut because she is smiling ear to ear and she is walking on
clouds. Below these clouds are people looking at her, clapping, holding their
stomachs and laughing. They don’t see the clouds, they just see me with my eyes
shut, smiling and walking on what I think are clouds. When I woke up I saw the
same.
It’s tragic and comic.
I woke up when the clouds decided that I was to heavy to walk on them. They
didn’t tell me that they were going to give-away just like that. They did, and
I fell with a thud on the marble floor of my house. That was the first why in
the string of whys I have been asking since then.
"Why did the clouds
give away, they could have told me I, I would have moved?"
The now awakened part
of me said, “Sweetheart, there were no clouds. You were high on something, it
was this very marble floor maybe you got confused with the colours.”
"Why were all those
people laughing at me? I knew some of them, they could have told me that I was
not walking on clouds."
Awakened me said, “Honey,
it’s rare to find an idiot who thinks she is walking on clouds. Everyone likes
a good laugh, so they built more clouds for you and laughed even harder.”
“No one’s ever going
to tell you the truth. They should, but they won’t, it’s for you to figure out.
And you will once you fall flat on the marble floor. What you figure out is
always going to be wrong according to someone else. You’ll be told that you
were walking with your eyes shut. And that’s not entirely inaccurate. But now
that your eyes are not shut anymore you can stop serving yourself up as
entertainment to others.”
That was enough of a
lecture to put an awake person to sleep, but it worked the other way round for
me. So Awakened me and groggy me got together, we sighed and said the last ‘why’.
"Why me?"
We could spend
the rest of the 26th year looking for an answer to this question. Or
just say, F*** this S*** and figure out a way of building more reliable clouds
to walk on. For starters, let’s lose some weight.
Awakened me nods, and
votes for option two. So do aye!
