Cut!

Sometimes I imagine my life to be a never ending film. While I sit and write, there is a cut to something that is happening in my life. I can't see it but someone can.

I'm curious now. But hey! I have been cut off. There is no way of finding out. There is no script. At least I don't have it.

POINTLESS

Crazy is not really the correct word. But then thats exactly what the past few weeks have been. But there is a difference between a good crazy and a bad crazy. Fortunately for once its been good crazy for me.

If I want I can write a novel of a post here. Paint a beautiful picture of the places I visited, the wonders of nature I saw and conversations I had with myself. I guess that explains a lot.

Talking about a novel, I have to complete my unfinished one. Its going to be an year since I started writing it. Well that way a lot of things are going to reach the one year mark except my age which is doubling in double figures in a weeks time.

Thinking back in time is an amazing experience. When I take myself a year back I see an unemployed girl having a time of her life in a deserted hill of a campus with other unemployed people. ODing on romantic comedies and mooning, looning and drooling all over Hugh Jackman and Hugh Grant (whats with these Hughs, are you sure the pronunciation is not HOT in some other language?). Unfortunately the Vampires had not entered my life then.

Wow! that was just a year back? really? It suddenly seems like I have not had the time of my life for ages now.

DUCK WORTH

A short trip with my parents into the heart of nature might soon become the highlight of my life. So far and trust me this is very far, I have know clue what I want to be or do in this life. No one asked me whether I wanted this life or how I wanted it to be.

Creator the dictator just took the decisions and sent me on earth as a human being. A common stupid creation which he/she creates every two seconds. And the irony is through out this human life I am trying to be different.

Since this life is a decision made by the other, I am now working on my plans for the next. My choice shall prevail. I will make sure it does.

So I kind of have an idea what I want in my next life. This little trip I made this weekend helped me reach this decision. And for all the fossilized concerned people, my parents approve of my choice.

In my next life I wish to be born as a duck in the wild. Even better, a duck living in a resort on the banks of Kabini river in Karnataka, India.

If my plans workout this is how my next life will be:

I will definitley not be the Alpha duck so all I will have to do is follow one.

Wake up as the sun rises and follow my clan into the lake/pond/river. Its perfect morning workout as it requires a lot of cackling. But like dumb humans, ducks don't need to work out.

Float around in the water for a bit and then cackle back to the land, stroll around and dry myself.

Move closer to the soft ground again and breakfast with some worms and soft grass.

This is what I will be doing throughout the day.

In between I will cackle up and attack anybody who comes too close to my clan with a weird object in their hand.

When the sun starts setting again I will take one last round in the water come back, tuck my neck in and fall asleep.

The only thing I will dread is being eaten by a human or a crocodile.

What a beautiful life. I cannot wait to be born again as a slender white duck with an orange beak. You will be tempted to click a zillion pictures of me but if you get too close I will chase you and bite you.

From now on I shall pray and hope all of you will also pray that I come back to this earth as a duck. Colour, height or weight does not matter as long as I can float on water and cackle up a storm!

WHERE ARE THE TEARS GONE?

Past few days I have been stabbed by nostaligia. I don't know if it is a good sign or not a good sign. Most of it makes smile a very distant smile. Sometimes it makes my throat go dry and threatens me with some tears. But the tears never come.

Past few months I have been trying very hard to cry. But the tears don't come the way they used to sometime back. I saw the harshest tear jerkers and did not even feel the lump in my throat.

I feel like Chandler from the FRIENDS episode in which he could not cry.

Well there is nothing wrong in not being able to cry. But sometimes I wonder if I have become stone, cold, unfeeling or am I a living dead. I have yelled at myself for not being able to cry when the lovers seperate in a film. But don't feel their pain.

It has now become a challenge for me. Lets see what will make ME cry! In my head I keep saying your hero just died! Cry! cry! cry! Nopes. But she just settles with an unhappy expression. Not enough to make her cry.

THREE LINES

Crouched in the corner seat,
She looks out of the window.
A crumpled shawl is all she owns,
to guard her from the December snow.

She looks somewhere, she know not where,
But in her mind she lives elsewhere.
The train whistle blows for it knows where to go.

Stiffing from the chilly wind,
for once her forehead crinkles.
And living in those three lines is a story of a lifetime.

The first line etched deeply in her forehead,
has tales of a little girl.
Who lived a life without any care,
and frowned only to get her share.

The next line deeper than first,
it has all the newer things she learnt.
Made to bear a lot of pain,
and then told that she was supposed to be that way.

Now she frowned all the time,
fighting for what she thought was right.
She was a fairy no more,
to be one she had to do what others asked for.

The last line is growing deep,
she thinks of all that was and has been.
Sees many fighting her way,
to do things they wanted to always.

Now she frowns to think hard,
to remember where she kept her train pass.
And then she frowns, no it’s a smile,
at a little girl yet to form forehead lines.

IT WAS PINK!

Guess what? Today I saw a pink tree. Personally I'm not very found of the colour pink. But a pink tree is surely something to exclaim about! I am not losing it. There was a tree, absolutely pink.

Well probably its a sign. First a red tree now a pink tree. Its certainly not the end of the world. Its not like I am the only one seeing it. I showed it to others also. But I'm not sure if they saw it the way I did.

I wish I had an automated camera fitted on me and I could just take pictures of these unusual things. You will not believe me otherwise.

But who cares if you believe me or don't. It won't stop me from seeing trees in every possible colour. Either ways I have nothing to lose. Just a lot of colourful trees to see.

PEEPING TOMS

Men with extremely short T'shirts are a put off. Someone needs to tell them that. I volunteer to do so. Since I am into social service I will do all of you one more favour.

When you choose to wear those extremely short T'shirts please remember that no one is interested in seeing your butt crack. A man's face and torso are the only things worth attention. The rest should be kept under wraps.

It gets worse when you are wearing a a gem studded belt thinking you are all cool. It does not work dude. It's grose! And to top it all you give a sneek peak of your blazing red chaddis!

Seriously man! If you want to show off your undies, wear something classier. Even then please don't show that off. It is hideous and ridiculous.

When Saif Ali Khan shows off its different. He is not great either but then things on screen look better, there is a screen in between.. remember!

Well, a lot of this might apply to us women also.

In another fashion era getting a peek at someone's Chaddi used to be an absolute delight. "Aye! teri chaddi dikh rahi hai! Wasn't there a delight in pointing that out to someone. Attracting the worlds attention to it. There were cleverer ways of saying this. Like I know the colour of your chaddi today! and the victim would challenge how? and you can say its magenta I can see it. And the best one was Free Show!

But the fun is all over in this new fashion era, where you get to see so many varied varieties and cannot even say "teri chaddi dikh rahi hai!" Well if we are going to be broad minded and accept free shows, then there should be some equality.

If you can turn a blind eye to a scarlet thong then an innocent black bra strap or white baniyan sleeve should not bother you either. Whats it with trying to be so careful about it all the time.

We all know we all wear one. So why so much hyperness if it peek out once in a while. We should be fair to both the under dogs, either hide both or allow both some amount of freedom to both.

Even they need to see what the world looks like once in a while.

Having said all that, I still hold that men with extremely short T'shirts are a BIG turn off!